Yes Juliette is 7 months old today, but that's not what this post is about. Its about ME and being a mom. I have now been a mother for 7 months and I LOVE it.
Great things about being a mom:
Unconditional
LOVE. Feeling so much love for a little baby and feeling loved as a mother and wife. I love the look in her eyes when she sees me. She knows I am her mom and just gets so excited and smiley. Matt and I could just stare at her and play with her for hours! She is the best. I also have more of an appreciation and love for my mother.
See
learning and growth- every achievement is so fun and exciting. She is so smart! She's a determined little busy body. She is getting a personality and likes to babble a lot. I LOVE have the cutest baby ever!! She really is darling with her bald head and cute dimples. Everywhere we go people say she's a good, happy, cute baby. I love dressing her in cute little outfits, cleaning her earrings and putting a bow on. She's my little girly girl.
Family- Knowing that she is my baby. Matt and I created her. Knowing that you are an eternal family. I'm thankful for the unity a baby brings and I just love seeing Matt be a father. He's an incredible dad! I am just so grateful for the opportunity and trust that Heavenly Father must have for parents to care for his children. I have learned so much as a mother and want to do my best. I have learned patience! I have learned that it is ok for kids to cry. I'm thankful for Baby Wise. Juliette sleeps through the night and has since she was about 8 weeks old.
There are some
challenges too. Here are some I've faced:
Pumping at work. First of all I loved maternity leave!! It was so nice to be home with the baby and feed her and play with her. People say that they get depressed after having a baby and being cooped up in the house. I never really felt depressed. I felt honored to be a mother to this beautiful baby girl. The first two weeks were a blur with little sleep and lots of feeding and cuddling. The third week was a little annoying because I was ready to get out of the house but under doctors orders we had to wait until she was 3 weeks old since she was so small. Week 4-10 were awesome. We never got bored and I didnt get nearly as much done as I thought I would being home all day. Taking care of a child is hard work! But I was SOO happy. And... I knew the day would come when i had to return to work to make some money for the family. I bought a nice Medela double pump and was kind of excited to use it. When I went back to work I thought it would be so exciting to reunite with my friends/co-workers and get busy working with clients again. But it was hard. So hard. I didnt cry when I left Juliette at day care or with my mother-in-law becuase I know that they know how to take care of her and that she'll have fun and be safe. But I cried every single time I pumped. I felt so out of the loop at work. I missed Juliette and would rub baby lotion on my hands and just sniff it, look at pictures of her and cry. I felt like a cow hooked up to a milking machine. I felt bad leaving for a half hour twice a day when I had a lot of work. I just kept on pumping everyday because I know how important breast milk is for infants and felt it was my responsibility to provide her with this milk. I also felt truly blessed becuase I had a lot of milk, didnt have any problems with her latching on or drinking from a bottle, my nipples never got sore or cracked and I just felt so lucky to be able to breast feed so I wanted to continue doing it while I could. I love the faces Juliette makes while she is eating and it was sad to be pumping and not seeing her smile and just look so satisfied with a little milk mustache after eating. I love my baby girl!
I believe you are more forgetful and clumsy while you are pregnant becuase your hormones are out of whack but I was also forgetful once I had the baby too. The first few weeks back I would always forget to take something I needed to work. Sometimes I would forget the little ice pack for my cooler, the cooler, the bottles, or my pump all together. There was this day where I forgot the bottles but my breasts were full and I needed to at least express some milk. I go into a private EMT room to pump. It was probably the fifth time I went to pump at work. Since I didnt have any bottles I saw paper cups in the EMT room and thought "Oh perfect, I'll pump into the cups and when I'm done pour it into baggies and take it home" So I got situated and started pumping into this flimsy paper cups. Little did I know that the EMT room light is a motion censored light and it went off. I was sitting in the corner, in a pitch black room in a chair hooked up to a machine with two open cups of milk- and I couldnt just walk around and get the light to turn back on. I kicked my legs but it wasnt in range to turn on the light. Finally I stood up and one of the cups of milk poured down my leg onto my light gray pants. Awesome! How awesome. Not only was I all wet but I also smelled like a milk factory. I took off my pants and called Matt not knowing what to do. He laughed (now looking back it is pretty funny) but I cried. I wished my work had hand dryers but no luck, just paper towels. I dabbed up as much as I could and then swung them around making the air drying process faster. I collected myself and went back up to my office once my pants were dry enough to put back on and didnt look like I'd peed myself. I decieded to never again pump into an open cup and I also got a lamp in the EMT room so I could turn it on in case the motion sensored light shut off. Fun times. I think I'm done pumping...
Being on time. As if I wasnt already a person that was always running late, getting a baby ready and out the door takes even longer! When I go somewhere with her it seems that she always spits up or has a blow out right before we leave and I have to wipe her down and change her outfit. In the mornings it is hard to feed her and then just rush and get ready. Sometimes I just have to warm up a bottle and have her feed herself if I wake up late. I wish I could wake up, feed her, cuddle and just hold her and stare at her while she's a little baby and then get ready and go into work like at 9. But somedays that's not an option. It's hard to balance everything like giving rides to day care, working, doctor appointments, appointments for myself (doctor, dentist, etc.) and being on time to them all. Its something I really need to work on.
Seeing babies in pain. It is SOO sad when she is sick. Both times that she's been really sick (and couldnt go to day care) I had events at work and couldnt stay home with her. One day Matt stayed home with her and the second time my mother-in-law took her to the doctor and she had a high fever and a double ear infection. It was so hard not being with her when I knew she was feeling crummy. It is hard being a parent and wanting to be able to help them but they just have to get better on their own and with medicine.
I really want to make this for Juliette for 4th of July! Isn't that material for the skirt adorable?
